Once again I'm up all night. I was so tired all day too. I don't know what it is. My husband can just totally pass out within 5 minutes. But not me. It takes forever. I watch movies yo help me fall asleep. I used to listen to the radio, but since we don't have xm anymore, it's been hard falling asleep to commercials and trashy shows on regular radio.
I suppose it doesn't help that life sucks. Once again I'm on the bottom of everyones list. No time for me, the ugly fat person who has medical problems and can't do anything. Yeah, who really wants to hang out with me? So this is the shit I think about at 1am, because that's when I hits the most. And it sucks. You don't know how many times I wish I'd just fall asleep and never wake up. Because I do feel like I'm a burden. I do feel like I'm only here as a convenience. And I don't like feeling that way. But no matter what I do, I can't change how people feel about me. I've barely made friends since I've moved here, and honestly, how will I be able to if I can't even feel good about myself?
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